Not Dead......Just been busy

Greetings fellow Warriors, after a very short break i have returned to the Kingdom of Blogdom and am now here for your amusement.

Just a reminder, over there ----------->  To your right (Or special left in some cases) are months, click on one of them and you can see previous blogs (6 for November)

It's been a busy few weeks, we went over to Wales 2 weeks ago for our annual pilgrimage to the Hard Rock Hell Festival. Now this years was truly a great event, One of mine and The Wenches' (More about her later) favorite bands were playing, Black Stone Cherry.
Now the whole weekend didn't entirely go to plan, we arrived on the Thursday, and personally, my intention was to take it easy on the Thursday..........I got shitfaced :-(
Friday comes around, and due to the excesses of the previous day the plan was to take it easy, was all going well until 11am when making a large coffee to sober myself up i put quite a large measure of Bailey's in instead of Milk. Shitfaced again but this time with some memory of shoving 25 MarshMallows into my mouth on Camera to win a competition!! :-(
Come the Saturday and i just decided to go with the flow and ended up......you guessed it......SHITFACED

Against my better judgement i have decided to publish a few lovely pictures of the weekend

These 4 guys came running over to me and asked if i was the famous Scud, and if they could have a picture with me, the same 4 guys headlined the Saturday night, some little band called Black Stone Cherry

And here is our Motley Crew, some are missing but hey, that's tough

I'm not even going to try and review any of the bands, i think i'll leave that to the pro sites, mainly because i'm not getting paid!

Last weekend my son came over and stayed with us for 5 nights, sounds pretty normal I hear you all say, but he was over on leave from Afghanistan where he is part of the Bucket & Spade Sandcastle Alliance (All joking aside, he is actually on leave from a 6 month tour of Afghan at the moment).
I was hoping he would have brought me a lovely gift from the land of Terry Taliban but alas, the only thing he bought us was some form of bird flu, The Wench and i have been on our death beds for the past week.

I will get my own back on him though by publishing his 'CUM FACE' on this blog :-)

I even taught him how to drink on Saturday night, It was going so well until around midnight when he decided to part with all the contents of his stomach over the pub floor. I honestly don't know if i was so proud to out drink a 20yr old squaddie or mortified at the lack of drinking prowess my son has!

Now this all brings me onto my next topic (How exactly my son throwing his guts up leads me onto Charlie and the Chocolate Factory i don't know, but we're here now so let's just go with it.....OK?)

For some ungodly reason I was watching Tim Burton's 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory' the other day and it annoyed me, it annoyed me to the point that i just wanted to go out and throw stones through Old People's Windows, because I now have proof that Old People are liers (hard word to spell check that one!) and will resort to anything to get what they want.
Take this move, we'll call it CATCF for short, The old Grandpa guy is a wreck, he just lies in that bed all day with his wife and In-Laws playing footsie and being waited on by his daughter and Grandson (Charlie). All he does is moan moan moan, about how he can't walk far etc, then the miracle cure happens, no, it's not Cocaine.
Charlie finds the Golden Ticket and gets a tour of the Factory, and asks Grandpa Fraud if he'll go with him.
Well fuck me sideways with a goat, The old Fraudster is up out of that sex pit of a bed and dancing round, all because he's going to a Chocolate Factory, he's Dancing, Singing, Running and Walking, when 5 minutes earlier the old fraudster couldn't even walk 5 feet without Pissing himself!!!
So there you have it Boys and Girls, don't trust the oldies!

Another TV Show that really really gets on my tits is Dogg The Bounty Hunter, now for those of you who have not seen this it's about a guy called Dwayne, his nickname is Dogg, he runs his own Bail Bond Firm and he is a Bounty Hunter. 90% of his staff are all his own Inbred Family, the other 10% are just retarded.
Now in nearly EVERY programme the camera crew will follow Dogg and his team in there attempt to capture a criminal who has failed to answer his bail.
When Dogg and his team are in a briefing on how to best capture the criminal they will nearly always say the following words "We have to capture him/her as we can't have this type of scum running loose on our streets:
I may be wrong here, but i seriously doubt it, WHO THE FUCK BAILED THESE SCUMBAGS OUT OF JAIL IN THE FIRST PLACE??? Yep, you guessed it, Doggs' Bail Bond firm!!! You honestly couldn't make this shit up!

After coming back from Hard Rock Hell Festival last week i thought i'd post up this flyer from Coachella Festival back in 1969, Next time I go back to Wales I will slap my Dad around the head for not going to this. What an awesome line up

I honestly would cream myself every 10 minutes faced with a line up like this, just shows how bad Festivals are nowadays.


Now I leave you good people with my picture of the week, and there's a lesson involved here, PUNCH THE KIDNEYS, THE BRUISES DON'T SHOW ;-)